Sunday, November 1, 2009

Frustration is short-lived, so is excitement.

Farmville keeps me alive. So much so that it has started looking like work to me. Not harvesting a crop is a crime.

Well, if I was actually farming, I would have at least got some exercise. But then all these winds and rains would have worried me. And the news that they are opening the shutters of Malampuzha dam would have excited me. We are visiting the dam anyways. It will be fun to see the waves lashing at the dam walls and spilling over. I guess the 2012 flood is on its way.

But for the past few days, I have got this strong feeling that we won't drown to the end of the world. We'll rot. The world will rot to its own death. Everything seems to rot faster these days. Food, people, their bodies, their minds. The only thing that doesn't rot is waste. Plastic just refuses to rot.

Friday, October 16, 2009

back in line

Visiting my own blog after such a long time. Was happy for the past 4 months that I had work to do, which suddenly stopped and now looking forward for it to start again. But still the lazy and procrastinating monster inside me doesnt let me do anything. Get up at 9 am, eat, facebook, eat, sleep, eat, facebook and again sleep. Well, if this is the kind of life those hard working people want at some point of time, it isn't really exciting.

I do dream of writing, shooting and decide I should get started immediately. But the determination starts brewing when I'm on the pot and it doesn't live past my toilet door. Sad.

Walk. Yoga. Dance. Music. Bliss.


Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Procrastination Unlimited

Hav been wanting to write something here for a long time. Always start writing something....2-3 sentences and then move on to something else, thinking I'll come back and finish what I had started off. No....nothing is happening. so many things I had planned/thought/wished to write. reviews, stories, scripts and the entries.

Saturday, May 30, 2009

upcoming hypocrite

It’s funny. We try to connect with the world and yet stay disconnected with the people just beside you. I don’t sleep at night beside my mom anymore because I want to be on the internet and it’s faster at night. I can’t understand who am I trying to connect with. You don’t belong anywhere.

You turn away from the people you see everyday who need help. Yet you go around the world looking for a topic for your next documentary film on human rights. No, I’m not blaming anyone. This is happening to me, right here. You empathize with the people through your films, but forget about it once you are off the camera.

I talk and sermonize about global warming, and pretend to be an anti-AC person. Yet I run into my AC room whenever I need to sit down and write, because the heat is unbearable.

I have always rebuked and reprimanded hypocrisy and hypocrites, but am I myself ending up as one?

Friday, April 3, 2009

My Maya-Aztec Astrology Report

This is what my Maya-Aztec Astrology report says:

You are probably highly regarded by others for one accomplishment or
another. You may be way ahead of your competitors, or you have made your mark in the field you work in. You are probably also popular with others and you have earned a well-deserved fame and recognition from your peers. Even your enemies respect your successful ways.

Behind the all-around competency described above is your integrity and personal
confidence. You will "stick to your guns" when under fire, keep a "stiff upper lip" when in trouble and, like the reed, remain firm when pressed. There is a militant side to you, and although you don't deliberately seek conflict, you seem to thrive in it. You can be politely aggressive, or a crusader for a cause -- but to you life is something to be won through strength and conviction.

You are quite ambitious -- but usually also very clear about your goals and intentions. You have principles that govern your
behaviour, and these are often of a moral or ethical nature. You may be attracted to religious or philosophical studies, or possibly concerned with justice. If you did not receive a good education, then you may have some problems in being opinionated and judgmental.

You work very hard, and you are far-sighted. You know the value of consistency and are capable of disciplining yourself to
accomplish a task, even though it may take some time. Your inner confidence lets you do things that others would shy away from and your openness to new ideas keeps you in the forefront of your field. Your most important attribute is that you want to learn.

Teaching, politics, and the social sciences seem to appeal to you. These subjects aid you in communicating and
understanding others. Closely related to your love of knowledge is your love of open spaces and travel. You can't stand restraint -- you must be free to do as you choose.

One of your worst problems is that you tend to go to extremes. This may be compensated by your accomplishments in the
world, but may also be a real problem. You are not a moderate person. You are a high-powered achiever who can burn yourself and your friends out if you let things get too carried away.

Beneath your surface personality you struggle with powerful inner conflicts. This internal wrestling can lead to your taking some rather committed positions on some issues.

When you get going, you play hardball, and others may think you a bit fanatical at times, or somewhat extremist.
But you know what you have to do in life -- even though you may not be able to express it logically. You are ultimately driven by your emotions to attain positions of respect and power.

"But you know what you have to do in life -- even though you may not be able to express it logically." These words struck me. I think that's the only thing that's somewhat true.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

An old poem I found

This is a poem which I found in one of my architecture notebooks. I don’t remember when and what inspired me to write this. But I was quite surprised to see this after such a long time, and couldn’t believe that I could have ever written this.

[There are no corrections. Everything has been directly transplanted from the notebook, including the punctuation.]

Strolling in the woods
I was thinking of her.
She was my love

She was my life

But I never know
Why she left me lone.
I spent my days
From dawn to dusk
Remembering & adoring her.

One whom I loved and cared.

But there came the shock of my life

When she asked me


Who am I?

Born in the marshy moors

Brought up by the sons of the sea
Growing up was a burden for me
But she was the one

Who changed my life

Who was I?
I was her love.

Who am I

I know not.

Who am I

Tell me God

Who am I?